Conditioning of Mind

As I was passing the elephants, I suddenly stopped, confused by the fact that these huge creatures were being held by only a small rope tied to their front leg. No chains, no cages. It was obvious that the elephants could, at anytime, break away from their bonds but for some reason, they did not.
I saw a trainer near by and asked why these beautiful, magnificent animals just stood there and made no attempt to get away. "Well," he said, "when they are very young and much smaller we use the same size rope to tie them and, at that age, it's enough to hold them. As they grow up, they are conditioned to believe they cannot break away.
They believe the rope can still hold them, so they never try to break free." I was amazed. These animals could at any time break free from their bonds but because they believed they couldn't, they were stuck right where they were.
Like the elephants, how many of us go through life hanging onto a belief that we cannot do something, simply because we failed at it once before?

THE DINNER DATE

After 21 years of marriage, my wife wanted me to take another woman out to dinner and a movie. She said, "I love you, but I know this other woman loves you and would love to spend some time with you."

The other woman that my wife wanted me to visit was my MOTHER, who has been a widow for 19 years, but the demands of my work and my three children had made it possible to visit her only occasionally.

That night I called to invite her to go out for dinner and a movie. "What's wrong, are you well?" she asked. My mother is the type of woman who suspects that a late night call or a surprise invitation is a sign of bad news. "I thought that it would be pleasant to spend some time with you," I responded.

"Just the two of us." She thought about it for a moment, and then said, "I would like that very much."

That Friday after work, as I drove over to pick her up I was a bit nervous. When I arrived at her house, I noticed that she, too, seemed to be nervous about our date. She waited in the door with her coat on. She had curled her hair and was wearing the dress that she had worn to celebrate her last wedding anniversary. She smiled from a face that was as radiant as an angel's. "I told my friends that I was going to go out with my son, and they were impressed," she said, as she got into the car. "They can't wait to hear about our meeting."

We went to a restaurant that, although not elegant, was very nice and cozy. My mother took my arm as if she were the First Lady. After we sat down, I had to read the menu. Her eyes could only read large print. Half way through the entries, I lifted my eyes and saw Mom sitting there staring at me. A nostalgic smile was on her lips. "It was I who used to have to read the menu when you were small," she said. "Then it's time that you relax and let me return the favor," I responded.

During the dinner, we had an agreeable conversation - nothing extraordinary but catching up on recent events of each other's life. We talked so much that we missed the movie. As we arrived at her house later, she said, "I'll go out with you again, but only if you let me invite you." I agreed.

"How was your dinner date?" asked my wife when I got home. "Very nice. Much more so than I could have imagined," I answered.

A few days later, my mother died of a massive heart attack. It happened so suddenly that I didn't have a chance to do anything for her. Some time later, I received an envelope with a copy of a restaurant receipt from the same place mother and I had dined. An attached note said: "I paid this bill in advance. I wasn't sure that I could be there; but nevertheless, I paid for two plates - one for you and the other for your wife. You will never know what that night meant for me. I love you, son."

At that moment, I understood the importance of saying in time .

Life and Love

My husband is an Engineer by profession, I love him  for his steady  nature, and I love the warm feeling when I lean  against his broad  shoulders. 
Three years of courtship and now, two years into  marriage, I would have  to admit, that I am getting tired of it. The reasons  of me loving him  before, has now transformed into the cause of all my  restlessness. I am a sentimental woman and extremely sensitive when  it comes to a  relationship and my feelings, I yearn for the  romantic moments, like a  little girl yearning for candy. My husband, is my  complete opposite,  his lack of sensitivity, and the inability of  bringing romantic moments  into our marriage has disheartened me about love. One  day, I finally  decided to tell him my decision, that I wanted a  divorce. 
"Why?" he asked, shocked. "I am tired, there are no  reasons for  everything in the world!" I answered.
He kept silent the whole night, seems to be in deep  thought with a  lighted cigarette at all times. 
My feeling of disappointment only increased, here was  a man who can't  even express his predicament, what else can I hope  from him? 
And finally he asked me:" What can I do to change  your mind?" Somebody  said it right, it's hard to change a person's  personality, and I guess,  I have started losing faith in him. 
Looking deep into his eyes I slowly answered : "Here  is the question,  if you can answer and convince my heart, I will  change my mind, Let's  say, I want a flower located on the face of a  mountain cliff, and we  both are sure that picking the flower will cause your  death, will you  do it for me?" 
He said :" I will give you your answer tomorrow...."  My hopes just sank  by listening to his response. 
I woke up the next morning to find him gone, and saw  a piece of paper  with his scratchy handwriting, underneath a milk  glass, on the dining  table near the front door, that goes.... 
My dear, 
"I would not pick that flower for you, but please  allow me to explain  the reasons further.."
This first line was already breaking my heart. I  continued reading. 
You always leave the house keys behind, thus I have  to save my legs to  rush home to open the door for you.
You love traveling but always lose your way in a new  city, I have to  save my eyes to show you the way. 
You like to stay indoors, and I worry that you will  be infected by  infantile autism. I have to save my mouth to tell you  jokes and stories  to cure your boredom. 
You always stare at the computer, and that will do  nothing good for  your eyes, I have to save my eyes so that when we  grow old, I can help  to clip your nails,and help to remove those annoying  white hairs. So I  can also hold your hand while strolling down the  beach, as you enjoy  the sunshine and the beautiful sand... and tell you  the colour of flowers,  just like the color of the glow on your young face... 
Thus, my dear, unless I am sure that there is someone  who loves you  more than I do... I could not pick that flower yet,  and die.. " 
"Now, that you have finished reading my answer, if  you are satisfied,  please open the front door for I am standing outside  bringing your  favorite bread and fresh milk... 
I rush to pull open the door, and saw his anxious  face, clutching  tightly with his hands, the milk bottle and loaf of  bread.... 

Now I am very sure that no one will ever love me as  much as he does,  and I have decided to leave the flower alone...  
That's life, and love.

 

A doctor's diary

It was a busy morning, approximately 8:30 am, when an elderly gentleman, in his 80's, arrived to have stitches removed from his thumb. He stated that he was in a hurry as he had an appointment at 9:00 am.

I took his vital signs and had him take a seat, knowing it would be over an hour before someone would to able to see him. I saw him looking at his watch and decided, since I was not busy with another patient, I would evaluate his wound.

On exam it was well healed, so I talked to one of the doctors, got the  needed supplies to remove his sutures and redress his wound. While taking care of his wound, we began to engage in conversation. I asked him if he had a doctor's appointment this morning, as he was in such a hurry.

The gentleman told me no, that he needed to go to the nursing home to eat breakfast with his wife.

I then inquired as to her health. He told me that she had been there for a while and that she was a victim of Alzheimer Disease. As we talked, and I finished dressing his wound, I asked if she would be worried if he was a bit late.

He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that she had not recognized him in five years now.

I was surprised, and asked him. "And you still go every morning, even though she doesn't know who you are?"

He smiled as he patted my hand and said. "She doesn't know me, but I still know who she is."

 

----I had to hold back tears as he left, I had goose bumps on my arm, and thought, "That is the kind of love I want in my life." True love is neither physical, nor romantic. True love is an acceptance of all that is, has been, will be, and will not be.

 

Cup of Life

A group of working adults got together to visit their University lecturer. The lecturer was happy to see them. Conversation soon turned into complaints about stress in work and life.  The Lecturer just smiled and went to the kitchen to get an assortment of cups - some porcelain, some in plastic, some in glass, some plain looking and some looked rather expensive and exquisite.

The Lecturer offered his former students the cups to get drinks for themselves.  
When all the students had a cup in hand with water, the Lecturer spoke:   "If you noticed, all the nice looking, expensive cups were taken up,   leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is normal that you   only want the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems   and stress. What all you wanted was water, not the cup, but we   unconsciously went for the better cups."  
"Just like in life, if Life is Water, then the jobs, money and position   in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold/maintain Life, but   the quality of Life doesn't change."  
"If we only concentrate on the cup, we won't have time to enjoy/taste   the water in it."

 

Good boss

Scientists at the Rocket launching station in Thumba, were in the habit of working for nearly 12 to 18 hours a day. There were about Seventy such scientists working on a project. All the scientists were really frustrated due to the pressure of work and the demands of their boss but everyone was loyal to him and did not think of quitting the job. 

 

One day, one scientist came to his boss and told him - Sir, I have promised to my children that I will take them to the exhibition going on in our to  wnship. So I want to leave the office at 5 30 pm.  His boss replied - O K, , You are permitted to leave the office early today. 

 

The Scientist started working. He continued his work after lunch. As usual he got involved to such an extent that he looked at his watch when he felt he was close to completion.The time was 8.30 p.m  Suddenly he remembered of the promise he had given to his children. He looked for his boss,,He was not there. Having told him in the morning itself, he closed everything and left for home.   Deep within himself, he was feeling guilty for having disappointed his children.  He reached home. Children were not there.His wife alone was sitting in the hall and reading magazines. The situation was explosive, any talk would boomerang on him.

 

His wife asked him - Would you like to have coffee or shall I straight away serve dinner if you are hungry.

The man replied - If you would like to have coffee, i too will have but what about Children???

Wife replied- You don't know - Your manager came at 5 15 p.m and has taken the children to the exhibition.

 

What had really happened was  The boss who granted him permission was observing him working seriously at 5.00 p.m. He thought to himself, this person will not leave the work, but if he has promised his children they should enjoy the visit to exhibition. So he took the lead in taking them to exhibition .  The boss does not have to do it everytime. But once it is done, loyalty is established.  That is why all the scientists at Thumba continued to work under their boss eventhough the stress was tremendous.

 

By the way , can you hazard a guess as to who the boss was?

 

He was A P J Abdul Kalam.

Cleaning Lady

 During my second month of college, our professor gave us a pop quiz.

 I was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions until I read the last one:

 "What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?"

 Surely this was some kind of joke. I had seen the cleaning woman several times.

 She was tall, dark-haired and in her 50s, but how would I know her name?

 I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank. Just before class ended,                                                                           

 One student asked if the last question would count toward our quiz grade.

 "Absolutely," said the professor. "In your careers, you will meet many people. All are significant.

 They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say "hello".

 I've never forgotten that lesson. I also learned her name was Dorothy.

 

Simple the better

One of the most memorable case studies on Japanese management was the case of the empty soap box, which happened in one of Japan's biggest cosmetics companies. The company received a complaint that a consumer had bought a soap box that was empty. Immediately the authorities isolated the problem to the assembly line, which transported all the packaged boxes of soap to the delivery department. For some reason, one soap box went through the assembly line empty.
Management asked its engineers to solve the problem. Post-haste, the engineers worked hard to devise an X-ray machine with high-resolution monitors manned by two people to watch all the soap boxes that passed through the line to make sure they were not empty. No doubt, they worked hard and they worked fast but they spent whoopee amount to do so.
But when a rank-and-file employee in a small company was posed with the same problem, did not get into complications of X-rays, etc but instead came out with another solution. He bought a strong industrial electric fan and pointed it at the assembly line. He switched the fan on, and as each soap box passed the fan, it simply blew the empty boxes out of the line.
Learn to focus on solutions not on problems!

Encouragement

Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room.One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs. His bed was next to theroom's only window. The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back.The men talked for hours on end.They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation.

Every afternoon when the man in the bed by the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the thing he could see outside the window.The man in the other bed began to live for those one-hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the world outside. The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake.Ducks and swans played on the water while children sailed their model boats.Young lovers walked arm in arm amidst flowers of every color and afine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance.As the man by the window described all this in exquisite detail, the man on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine the picturesque scene.

One warm afternoon the man by the window described a parade passing by.Although the other man couldn't hear the band - he could see it. In his mind's eye as the gentleman by the window portrayed it with descriptive words. Days and weeks passed. One morning, the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths only to find the lifeless body of the man by the window, who haddied peacefully in his sleep. She was saddened and called thehospital attendants to take the body away.As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man asked if he could bemoved next to the window.The nurse was happy to make the switch, and after making sure he was comfortable, she left him alone.

Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look at the real world outside.He strained to slowly turn to look out the window beside the bed.It faced a blank wall. The man asked the nurse what could have compelled his deceased roommate who had described such wonderful things outside this window.

The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see the wall. She said, "Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you."